Home from Boston

Dear Charlene,

I forgot to tell you about my trip home from my GREAT weekend. I hope you disinfected your house already from the cold I brought with me.

Anyway, when I got to the airport I decided to grab something to eat at au bon pain. I had planned it so I had plenty of time to go through security. Ah, plans. Anyway, after choosing a sandwich and hot soup, at the register this guy made a really lame, totally gross and inappropriate pass at me, but I didn't really realize what he said until I sat down to eat because my ears were so clogged up. And I didn't get up to slap him because I was too tired and lazy. It was already taking so much effort just to breathe and eat at the same time. So I guess if a pimply, desperate, under-developed 18-year-old made a sexual comment to me at 36 I guess that means I've still got it, right??? Can I just hold on to that???

Then, I went through security. Remember the bottle of water you gave me? Remember how you reminded me over and over to dump it out before I went through security? Yeah, I forgot. Guess what? The TSA people do not like containers with liquid in them. After asking me, "IS THIS YOUR BAG?" and my realizing that she was not complimenting me on how cute it was, I got promptly escorted out of security. They told me I could dump it out and then re-enter the line. Well, they dumped me out at the end of the stairs in baggage claim. I could not figure out how to get back upstairs. Everything said in big letters NO RE-ENTRY or DO NOT ENTER and I already made them mad once, so I figured I'd better not break any more rules. So I am running around like a crazy person trying to figure out how to get back up there and OF COURSE there are no employees anywhere to ask for directions. Finally, as my plane is boarding I found an elevator in a back corner. Upstairs, I ran down the hallway to security. The positive thing about it taking so long is that they'd changed shifts so I didn't have to do the shoeless security walk of shame in front of them. I got through the line as quickly as anyone possibly can, and made it to my gate as they were boarding the last people. The bright side, as I told you, is that I got a whole row to myself on the plane. That is unlike this poor girl a few rows in front of me, who happened to get placed next to two laughing hyenas. Apparently they rented that John Travolta comedy with the bear and and were laughing so loudly for two hours that people started saying things to them. I was going to offer one of my three luxury seats, but she had to "go to the bathroom" and plopped herself down somewhere else. I was happy for her. It does make me wonder if the movie really is that funny.

Anyway, thank you again for a truly awesome weekend. My kids are still alive and the house still standing. And I am missing you guys and your wonderful hospitality.

I will post pictures tomorrow!
(p.s. Finty and I are planning on sneaking into your suitcase when you go to France. So use a big one.)